Pregnancy Update - 31 Weeks

I had another sonogram on Wednesday, and I'm feeling a bit discouraged. I have to say, though, that I feel much better than I did on Wednesday! I have been digging into the Word to build my faith up, and it's definitely helping.

The baby is estimated to be about 4 lb. 12 oz. which puts her weight in the 90th percentile at this stage of the game. That is SHOCKING to me, because I do not make big babies. I know that I only have 1 child so far, but it took him well over a year to hit 20lbs! He was 7 lb. 3 oz. at birth. I know that the ultrasound can be 1 pound off, and they told me this. Still, that is bigger than they like to see at this point. She is also still breech, but they tell me that there is time for her to move. Also, because she was taking up my ENTIRE womb, they could not measure a good amount of amniotic fluid around her. I was told to drink water like crazy all week long, and then I have another ultrasound next Wednesday to see if the fluid has increased. Now I have to have a fetal NST (non stress test) done every Monday and Thursday until the baby is born. WOW! What would I possibly do if I was still working full-time? It's going to be hard enough to find someone to watch Joshua twice a week for these appointments, not to mention my monthly sonograms and ob-gyn appts. every two weeks. It's exhausting just thinking about it! I counted up the appointments I have scheduled so far, and I have 19, yes 19 appointments scheduled for August pertaining to my pregnancy.

Anyhow, I don't have much else to say at this point, except that I just need to build my faith up to believe that God is going to cause her to flip into the birthing position that I need her to be in to avoid a c-section again. Also, I need to believe that God will slow her growth down. The doctors tell me that she is growing so quickly, because she is producing too much insulin. It breaks my heart to know that her body is doing this in response to my body not processing sugar correctly. My body is causing her body to do this. I feel like I'm not protecting her. What an awful thought.

Well, that's all I have for now. I need to do some heavy-duty praying about this... I've lost my perspective this week, and that's the last thing that I can afford to do right now.

Pregnancy Picture - Week 20

I'm 20 weeks today! It's almost hard to believe sometimes. I'm finally able to think about chicken without getting sick! With both of my pregnancies, morning sickness hit late (around 8-10 weeks) and ended late. It's nice to be able to have an appetite again. During my last visit to my nutritionist, she told me that she wanted me to start eating more carbs to gain or maintain my weight. I NEVER thought I'd be hearing that from anyone! In the last two weeks since I've seen her, I've been allowing myself to eat more carbs. I'm afraid to eat carbs (except fruit, veggies, etc.), because I know that's what makes my body gain weight. (I could easily live on a carbs-only diet if I was allowed!) I weighed myself this morning, and I've gained 3 pounds in the last week or so. I'd say it's time to cut down on the carbs again. I know that I'm supposed to be gaining weight now - I'm pregnant!!! But, on the other hand, part of me wonders if some of that weight isn't from eating so many more carbs again. I just get so scared sometimes that my weight is going to snowball out of control again. It took me a year (and gaining 40 pounds on TOP of the pregnancy weight I never lost from my son) to figure out that I was gaining weight due to my body becoming insulin resistant. Little did I realize that every carb I ate was being stored as fat. All of that said, this pregnancy has been very challenging to me when it comes to putting on weight. I want to eat healthy for my baby. She comes first. I KNOW that with pregnancy comes weight gain, and that's healthy. I guess I just need to make sure that I'm eating balanced meals every day. One day at a time...

Just Some Updates...

I went to see the dietitian last week, and I'm so glad that I met with her! I was not sure what to expect, but the appointment went really well. It looks like I've already been eating almost as well as I can, so I'm pretty pleased about that. Before I got pregnant, I knew that the chances of me getting gestational diabetes (since I have PCOS) were pretty high, so I was constantly researching online what I should be eating from the beginning of my pregnancy (and before), so I could prevent any future problems. The "diet" that she recommended for me is actually too much food for me now! That sounds crazy, but I just don't have much of an appetite lately. I'm sure as I get further into my second trimester I'll be glad that I'm "allowed" to eat much more than I am eating now.

I did learn a couple things that I didn't learn during all of my research beforehand. First of all, I'm supposed to eat something before I go to bed. This will help my blood sugar from getting too low overnight, and it will prevent ketones from spilling over into my bloodstream. (This is why they check your urine at each ob-gyn appt. when you're pregnant). Another thing I learned is that if I eat any fruit or something else sweet, I need to eat protein with it to keep my blood sugar from getting too high. At first I didn't like the sound of that, because sometimes all I want is a piece of fruit, and I don't feel like eating anything else with it. Then I found out that eating a handful of almonds with the fruit will work. When she first told me this, I envisioned myself having to eat a piece of chicken every time I wanted to eat some fruit! :)

I was also given a blood sugar monitor, and they showed me how to use it. I must admit that this was quite intimidating to me at first. After practicing several times, it gets easier, though. I've been testing my blood sugar twice a day right now - as soon as I get up in the morning and two hours after eating dinner in the evening. Every test has come back really good so far! It seems like my body is working just the way that it should, unless I'm instructed by a doctor to drink pure sugar as a glucose intolerance test! :)

I feel much better since this appointment, because I'm not scared anymore. This is all so new and definitely unfamiliar territory to me. I am confident that if I continue to eat the best way I know how and take care of my body, I will be ok. God is aware of everything that is going on, and he is watching out for me and the baby. He loves my baby more than I do. :)

This week I'm at the 16 week mark, and I'm realizing that I haven't really enjoyed this pregnancy so far. That's awful!!! I spent the entire first trimester with the whole "miscarriage fear" in the back of my head, and then I got this next scare when I hit my second trimester. I've desperately need to start focusing on enjoying this pregnancy, instead of worrying all the time. This is a happy and joyful time in my life and the lives of my husband and son. I'm going to relax and enjoy it from now on! :)

Thank you, Jesus, that You are in control, and not me. :)

I Will Not Lean On My Own Understanding!

Yesterday was a rough day, but God reminded me that He is still on the throne and not caught off guard by anything that has happened or will happen in my life!

Well...I have been diagnosed with gestational diabetes. I knew that I have been feeling horrible the last almost 2 weeks, but I was hoping it wasn't heading in this direction.

There was some sort of "miscommunication" (the best word I can think of) in my ob-gyn's office, and I found out yesterday that I could have continued on the Metformin during my entire pregnancy since I was doing so well on it. Now that I haven't been taking it for almost 2 weeks, they will not let me get back on it. The ob-gyn office I go to has several doctors and a midwife. When you're pregnant, you see a different doctor each time you have an appointment. This way you will know the doctor who ends up delivering the baby. This was not a problem or concern during my first pregnancy, because I did not have any complications in the least. This pregnancy, though, I feel that it has created an open door for error.

Enough said on that...I'm still praying about what to do at this point.

After a lot of crying yesterday afternoon, God spoke to my heart about all of this. God knew this was all going to happen. I'm going to be ok. The baby is going to be ok. I'm going to meet with a registered dietitian tomorrow to be put on a gestational diabetes diet. This will help balance my blood sugar and hopefully prevent me from having to take any insulin shots during my pregnancy. I really feel like God is telling me to forget about the Metformin issue. If I trust Him and also eat the way that I'm told to, everything will be ok. I'm so glad that I'm a Christian and know Who I need to trust, because otherwise I'd be really freaking out! :) (Not that I don't have my moments as it is!)

This all reminded me of one of my favorite verses in the bible:

Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding. In all of your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him, and He will direct and make straight and plain your paths. Proverbs 3: 5-6 (Amplified)

Thank you, Jesus! You know everything that's going to happen in my life before I do. You are the steady Rock in my life!