If You Died Tonight...



Where would you spend eternity if you died tonight?


On October 25, 2000, I went to work like any other day. When I got home, I had several messages on my answering machine, and I thought that was kind of strange. I only listened to a few of them, before I got the message from my former mother-in-law. She told me that they needed to come over and talk to me about something concerning Paul (my ex-husband). I had no idea what they would need to talk to me about.  Paul was an addict, and I figured it finally caught up with him. I started speculating, and I figured he must have been arrested for something. What I didn’t realize was that it did catch up to him, just not in the way that I had thought…

When Paul’s parents arrived at my door, I opened it up to see them looking like they had something terrible to tell me. While still standing in the doorway, Paul’s mom said, “I found Paul dead in his bed this morning.” His mom thought something seemed strange when it seemed like Paul was going to be late for work. He was still in his bedroom at noon, when he had to be at work by 1:00. His mom went in to find that he had died, only to realize later that he had actually died of a heroin & cocaine overdose up to 24 hours earlier.

If you died tonight, would you go to Heaven or Hell?

To back up a little, I became a born again Christian about 4 months before Paul died. Paul didn’t think of himself as a Christian, and the only times he went to church was when we were planning our wedding. (We actually had almost all of the scriptures removed from the wedding ceremony, because it didn’t seem necessary to us to include them. –Wow, have times changed!) After I got saved, I shared the gospel (not knowing that’s even what I was doing!) with him a couple times. Paul was someone who always had something to say. He was hard to find speechless, but he was speechless both times I mentioned Jesus to him. I didn’t want to push it, so I just moved on after I didn’t get a response. Around that same time, Paul told me that a police officer actually witnessed to him and gave him a New Testament bible. I thought that was really unusual, but he showed me the bible that he was given.

One week before Paul died, the two of us got together to talk about some unresolved things between us. I didn’t know he was still using at the time, but I should have – looking back. After our conversation, he took me home. When Paul left that day, we both knew it was our final goodbye…I just didn’t realize how final.

The next day, I felt bad about how our conversation went, and I decided to write him a letter to clarify some things. What I did, instead, was write a 3-page letter explaining my new relationship with Jesus, and how happy I knew he would be if he turned his life over to Him. The police found it opened up on top of his dresser, so I know he read it.  Did he give his life to Jesus in response?

I don’t know. I never got to talk to him again.

Looking back, I can see how God was giving him so many chances in the end. I witnessed to him 3 times, and that police officer did, also.

God gives us all opportunities to come to Him before we die, but it is up to us to make that choice! He’s not going to force us into a relationship with Him. Turning your life over to Jesus, repenting of your sins (walking away from your sin and turning towards Him) and asking Him for forgiveness is the ONLY way to get to Heaven! He doesn't expect you to clean your life up before you come to Him. You can't clean it up.  You would have by now if it was possible.  Jesus knows that.

This is so incredibly difficult, especially when we have loved ones who have died without a relationship with Jesus. I remember searching the bible in agony for any shred of evidence that someone could go to Heaven without giving his/her life to Jesus.  It's not in there.  There's no other way but through Jesus!

It’s not too late for you, and it’s not too late for your other loved one's who are still alive!

Give your life to Jesus today! This could be one of those last opportunities that God is giving you. I know that Paul had no idea that he was going to die when he did. He had a bunch of clothes in the back of his car that he bought a day earlier.  It's so strange to me to think that while he was shopping, he had no idea that he was going to die in just a few short hours. I hope that someday I will see him in Heaven. I don’t know if I will, though. He could have made that decision to follow Jesus, but I’ll always have to wonder. Let me tell you, it’s an excruciating thought to have to wonder about where he is right now. What I need to do is let that motivate me to share the gospel with others while I still can...NOW!

Share the gospel with the people in your life today! I cannot imagine a worse feeling than not sharing the gospel with someone (out of procrastination or fear) and then that person dying without Jesus in his/her life. I am speaking to myself here, also. I know that I have let fear and procrastination get in the way of sharing Jesus with people. When you look at the reality of the situation, God could be using you to be the last person to share the gospel with them.

If you are not born again, and desire to give your life to Jesus, make this prayer your own:

“Heavenly Father, I believe you love me. I believe Jesus died for me because of my sin and rose from the dead in victory. I confess Jesus as my Lord, and I receive the forgiveness of all my sins. Today I will turn away from my sins and follow You. Holy Spirit, come into my life. Thank You for saving me, in Jesus' name. – Amen."

Lord, Jesus, I thank you for giving us all opportunities to turn our lives over to You, before it's too late.  Please help me to share the gospel with others, so they can also spend eternity with You!

(If you would like more info. on what it means to be born again, click here.)

I Thought My Life Was Over...

It was 11 years ago that I thought my life was over.  My previous husband had moved out on July 3, 1999, and I thought that my life had very little hope after that.  We had just gotten married the year before, and I never got to see the dreams that I had in my heart with him begin to come to fruition.  It was practically over before it began.  I was crushed.

I realized that it was 11 years ago today, when I saw the date, July 3, 2010, on my computer.  I think it made an impression on me this morning, because it was also a Saturday when he left.  I'm a date person!  I always remember dates when things happened, etc.   

I can remember that day so clearly.  When Paul was moving his belongings out of our apartment, I went to my Grandma's house, because I couldn't bare to be around to watch him.  I came back later to find so much emptiness.  My apartment was empty, and my heart was empty.  I felt so incredibly alone.  I remember seeing the fireworks that weekend and looking up into the sky wondering what my future held.  I will never forget that feeling of hopelessness.  My heart was broken. 

Little did I realize that my future held the most amazing parts of my life, yet!  My loneliness and despair lead me to start searching for a church that I could go to.  I was not saved at the time, and I didn't even know that I needed to be saved.  I just wanted something to give me hope. 

Jesus reached out to me in one of the most tragic times of my life.  Little did I know that Paul would also die a little over a year later.  I THANK GOD that I gave my life to Jesus before that, because I don't know how I would have gotten through that without Him in my life.  I really don't. 

About a year after Paul moved out, I gave my life to Jesus.  For the first time in my life, I felt such purpose.  I felt such comfort in knowing that God had a plan for me, and I didn't always have to wander around hoping that I was going in the right direction.  Jesus has changed my life!  He led me to Kevin, whom I have now been married to for almost 6 years.  We now have 2 beautiful children, and I can't imagine any of them not being in my life!  Jesus has healed me, delivered me, and set me free of so many things!  I grew up believing in God.  I always knew He existed.  But there is a different in knowing who He is and having a relationship with Him.  I rely on Him.  I talk to Him every day.  He is always there to listen to me.  He will correct me when I'm going in the wrong direction.  He is the perfect father and friend.

I look back today and see myself looking up into the sky at those fireworks 11 years ago, and I thought my life was over.  I thought everything was ruined.  All my dreams for my future were never going to happen. Little did I know that my life with Jesus was just about to begin!  Every time I see fireworks I think of that day, and I'm reminded about just how much that Jesus has done in my life, and how much He has restored!  I never could have imagined how much having a real relationship with Jesus could show me my true purpose in life, transform my dreams, goals, and give me a new vision for my life.

If you don't have a true relationship with Jesus, you are missing out on more than you could ever imagine.  Whether you don't have any hope left in your life, or maybe you think your life is already just as you want it to be...having a true relationship with Jesus will transform your life in ways that you have never even thought of yet.  The biggest thing He will do for you is save your life!  He came to this earth to die in place of us.  He died for our sins, so we wouldn't have to live in hell for eternity!  If you allow Him into your heart and follow after Him, He will save you from all of that.  He will save you from having to spend ETERNITY in hell, and you will forever live with Him.  This is the ONLY way to get to heaven.  He loves you so much and wants to give you hope, purpose and eternal life with Him.  Like I mentioned before, maybe you think your life is already just the way you want it.  That may be, but you need to surrender your life to Him to be saved from hell when you die.  We all die, and no one knows when that moment will come. 

If you have never given your life to Jesus, ask Him to come into your life today!  Ask Him to become your Lord and Savior, and He will.  Ask Him to forgive you, and He will.  Turn your life from the direction you have been going, and start walking with Him.  Pray to Him every day.  Lean on Him for all of your decisions.  Lean on Him for everything!  Being a Christian is not about going to church on Sundays (although that's good to do!), it's about having a relationship with Jesus!  It's not about thinking about God every once in awhile, or just when you need help.  He wants nothing more than for you to give your entire life to Him!

Thank you, Jesus, that you are such a wonderful Lord and Savior!  You gave me hope when I had none.  You have delivered me, saved me, and given me a future that I never could have imagined otherwise.  I love you!

Picture credit:  personalitycafe.com

My Path To Freedom (part 1 of 3)

This post is a little (ok, a lot) different than many of my other posts. I am going to write about something that God has impressed on my heart to say. I want to talk about something that has been a struggle in my life for many years. After discussing this with my husband and pastor, I really feel like God has put it in my heart to do this; otherwise, I would never even attempt it! I feel like of a "window of grace" (I don't know how else to put it!) has opened up for me to write about this. I'm slightly terrified to post this, but I’m choosing to look past my fear of feeling “exposed” and be obedient to God.

While preparing to write this post, I was writing down everything that I wanted to say. I never thought that I had so much to say on the subject! I will be breaking this post up into 3 parts, because there’s just so much information. I hope that you will stick with me throughout these posts, because some of you (most of you) will be a bit shocked about what I will write. If you stick with me until the end, you will be a witness to the love, grace, mercy and power of my Savior, Jesus Christ!

I know that there are many different moral beliefs held by the people who read my blog. I know that some of you aren’t Christians. Depending on your beliefs, some of you may feel judged, offended, or (I’m hoping) blessed by what I write! (What a contrast!) I know that I’m possibly opening myself up to some major criticism (depending on who is reading this!), but I know that God has given me the grace to thoughtfully take the time to write down my story; and it’s all in His hand’s now. I would also like to thank Kevin for being so supportive about me posting this. You are the most wonderful husband in the world, and I am so glad that God put you in my life! With all of that being said….

I’m going to talk about the topic of homosexuality. Many different thoughts, beliefs, opinions, and judgments come to mind when that word is mentioned. What comes to your mind?

I have found that there are (at least) three different belief systems out there for Christians when it comes to homosexuality. I realize that when you step out of Christianity, there are countless other beliefs concerning this topic. My emphasis here will be how Christians believe:

#1 - Some Christians believe that it is ok to be gay. They believe that people are born that way, so no one should be judged for loving someone else, even if it is someone of the same sex. These Christians state that God has called us not to judge, so it is no one’s business what others do (as long as it’s not hurting anyone else). Any thought or attempt to “change” a person’s sexuality is just putting someone in denial and not accepting of who he or she really is.

#2 – Other Christians believe that God hates anyone who participates in a homosexual lifestyle. They believe that God condones anyone being hateful towards someone who is gay, because God is disgusted by it.

#3 – The third group of Christians (including myself) believe that it is a sin to have ANY kind of sexual relationship outside of the marriage union that God has established. Living out a gay/lesbian lifestyle fits into this category.  I must clarify, GOD DOES NOT HATE GAYS/LESBIANS/OR BI-SEXUALS. He hates the sin, not the person. (It is just as sinful for a man and a woman to have sex outside of wedlock.) The bible states that “practicing” homosexuals will be judged by God and will not inherit the Kingdom of God. Being tempted is not a sin. It’s how you handle the temptation that’s important. I will mention more about this later.

When it all comes down to it, how you or I feel about the subject really doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is how God sees homosexuality. There are several verses in the bible that refer to the judgment that will come to those who practice it. Practice means, “to repeat habitually ”.  I will talk more about this later, but being tempted is not a sin. Jesus was tempted all of the time, and He never sinned! It’s the “practice” of homosexuality that God condemns. Of course, if anyone is in a homosexual relationship, God will forgive him or her if they turn away from their sin and ask for forgiveness! (I want to mention that homosexuality is not the only "practice" that God condemns, as you will see from the scriptures below.  It is the topic of my post, though, so this is where my focus will be.)  Like I said earlier, it doesn’t matter how you or I feel about the subject. Since God is sovereign, it only matters what He says. Don’t just take my word for it! Look these up for yourself. I’m just referencing a few:

Romans 1:26-27 “Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones. 27In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion.”

Rev. 21:8 “But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars--their place will be in the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death."

I Corinthians 6:9-10 “Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders, nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. ”

So why am I writing about this? This is a subject that is very “sensitive” for me. When I was in my late teens, I became emotionally enmeshed and sexually involved with a female friend of mine. (Yikes, I actually said it! It's all downhill from here!) I’m still not sure how or why all this happened (neither of us had ever been involved in a homosexual relationship previously – and never have been since). We did not tell too many people about what was going on, but I’m sure it wasn’t too difficult to figure out for those who knew us well. We spent just about every waking moment together. She and I were just about joined at the hip, and I all but worshipped the ground that she walked on. My parents just separated, and she was the only person who understood what I was going through. Somehow, she was the only friend I had whose parents were divorced. She understood my pain, and she was the only one I felt like I could talk to. At this time, I was not a born again Christian. Leaning on God was not even a thought. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was trying to get from her what only God Himself could have given me. We were so incredibly dependent on each other that there wasn’t much room for anyone else. Her parents found out what was going on, and they threatened me and blamed me for breaking up their family. There was even talk of trying to press charges against me since I was 18 and she was 17 when it all began. I felt so horrible and shameful as it was. Prior to all of this, her family and I got along very well. Her family’s reaction to me made me feel like I was some kind of predator, when I really wasn’t. We knew that what we were doing was wrong, though, or we wouldn’t have kept it a secret. A couple of years later, she went her way and I went mine.

So, why am I telling you all of this? I will be writing about all of that in post #2.  Click HERE for part 2.

What Does It Mean To Be Born Again?

"I tell you the truth, unless a man is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God" (John 3:3).



Almost everyone knows who Jesus is. There is a difference between knowing who Jesus is and having a relationship with Him, though. God gives us the choice of having a second birth - to be born again and start a new life with Him. This happens when you willingly turn your back on sin, turn to Jesus for forgiveness, and ask Him to be Lord ... that is, the boss of your life. This is the only way to get to Heaven and spend eternity with Him. God loves you, no matter what you’ve done in your life, and He wants to have a relationship with you. There’s nothing that you’ve done that’s too big for Him to forgive!

Romans 10:9 says “If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”

To be born again and welcomed into the family of God, pray this prayer from your heart:

“Heavenly Father, I believe you love me. I believe Jesus died for me because of my sin and rose from the dead in victory. I confess Jesus as my Lord, and I receive the forgiveness of all my sins. Today I will turn away from my sins and follow You. Holy Spirit, come into my life. Thank You for saving me, in Jesus' name. – Amen.”

If you prayed this prayer, welcome to the family of God!  I would encourage you to take some important steps in order to grow in your relationship with Christ and experience maximum life change:

• Get a Bible you can call your own. There are many different versions available, so choose one that is easy for you to understand.  I, personally, found the New Believer's Bible (NLT) a great help when I was first born again.  It is easy to read, and it's set up specifically for people who are beginning to study the bible.

• Set aside time to read your Bible and pray each day. You don't have to start out praying for an hour each day!  Try to set time aside each day to pray without any distractions.  Prayer is simply talking to God.  Tell Him what's on your heart.  If you're not sure what to read, start with one of the gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke or John) in the New Testament.
   
• Look for a Bible believing church to attend. This is essential to your spiritual growth. A good church will provide you with instruction and leadership based in the Word of God and also encourage the development of the gifts that God has given you.
   
• Develop friendships with other Christians. One of the best places for a new believer to do this is in church! Become involved with other believers who also desire to follow God’s purpose and plan for their lives.

If you gave your life to Jesus today, I would love to hear about it.  Send me a comment or e-mail me @ mypurposeinhim@gmail.com to let me know!

Thank you, Jesus, for being such an approachable and loving Savior!  You desire to save all of us.  I thank you that you showed me of my need for a Savior.  I gave my life to you, and you saved me from having to spend eternity in hell.  Even better, that means I will spend eternity with you!  Thank you, Lord, for being so patient and loving me even when I was at my worst. I love you!

Do You Have A Secret Sin?

Is there anything in your life that you continually struggle with?  Do you have a "secret" sin that you hope is never found out?  Is there something that you find yourself doing, saying, or thinking over and over again (despite promises to yourself or someone else that you wouldn't do that anymore)?  Is there something that you have repeatedly asked God to forgive you for, and then you find yourself right back in that same situation again? 

That's exactly where I am.  I've been there for awhile, actually.

God put it in my heart yesterday that it's time to make some changes.

God revealed to me yesterday morning that I've become lazy.  I've been lazy in the sense of protecting my heart and my mind.  Have you ever had a sin in your life that you have just accepted as something you will always have to struggle with?  Maybe it's something that you don't exactly want to broadcast to the world, so you can't really talk to many people about it (if anyone). I have one of those things in my life.  I think a lot of us do, which is why I'm choosing to write about it today. 

Ephesians 6:12 states, “We wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.”

God showed me yesterday that I'm holding onto this sin, because (to me) it's part of who I am since I've struggled with it for what seems like f-o-r-e-v-e-r.  I may not like dealing with it, but it's very difficult for me to see myself not having to struggle with this.  God has revealed to me (again) that because I'm born again, that really isn't who I am anymore.  Knowing that in my head and accepting that with my heart are two different things, though. 

God showed me yesterday that I can't be delivered from this if I can't SEE myself delivered.  When Satan starts throwing his darts at me, I tend to try to ignore it.  That's been my strategy.  Well, it's not working!  It's not working, because I eventually end up letting my guard down and I wander right back into the same old trap. 

I'll never forget what one of my pastors once said to me.  When I told her that I was trying to ignore this, she asked me if Jesus ignored Satan when he tempted Him in the wilderness.  When Satan would tempt Jesus, did Jesus fight back with God's Word, or did He turn away to say, "Wow, look at those flowers over there.  Aren't they beautiful?" That's a funny example, but it really showed me that I had not been using what God gave me to fight my battles.  I have to fight this with the Word of God. I cannot ignore it or try to change the subject. I have to fight against it with the weapon that God has given me: His Word.

Once again, I've become very lazy in doing that.  God "tapped me on the shoulder" yesterday to show me that I haven't been fighting anymore.  I've been letting Satan walk all over me.  The danger in all of this is that when I ignore it, it starts to show up in my life again without me even noticing it at first.  It's kind of like a weed.  If I ignore the weeds in my garden, they will continue to grow and take over the whole garden.  I can only "conquer" them by pulling them out by the roots.  Weeds always grow back.  You don't just pull them out once and never have to do it again.  This is something that has to be done continually.  This is what God is showing me that I need to start doing again.  To be honest, I get tired of fighting.  It's easier for me to ignore it and hope it will go away.  Sometimes it seems just too painful to fight.  I hate having to deal with this.  It's not just going to go away all by itself, though.   

All unconfessed sin eventually leads to death of some kind.  I cannot continue to ignore this, because it just leads down a slippery slope of death.  Even just recently, I have seen what repetitive sin has done in a friend's life. This person has walked away from God and is going down his/her own path. If God is not at the end of that path - death is. James 1:15 states, "Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.” Sound extreme?  God has shown me that it's not.  Sin is nothing to take lightly.  It always leads you down a path away from God. 

If you have any particular sin that keeps creeping back into your life, you are not alone. 1 Peter 5:8.9 states, “Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls about like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. But resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same experiences of suffering are being accomplished by your brethren who are in the world.”

The good news is, we have a loving, all-knowing and powerful God who shows us how to conquer these things! Confess your sin to God, repent and ask for His forgiveness.  Ask Him to show you what changes you need to make in your life in order to help combat any recurring sins.  Study the bible to find out how God sees you, if you are born again.  It is often quite different than we see ourselves.  I recently wrote a post describing how God sees me vs. how I see myself. That experience was so revealing to me. 

If you're able, confide in a pastor or trusted friend.  I've learned first hand that when sin is brought out into the open, it has less power over you.  Maybe you deal with a sin that you think is no big deal, so you take it lightly.  ALL unconfessed sin leads you away from God, no matter how big or small the sin seems to you. 

I hope this has been some help or encouragement to someone.  This was not easy to write about, but I felt like I should.

Thank you, Jesus, that you are always with me.  Thank you for showing me who I am IN YOU.  I am no longer who I was.  There is nothing that is hidden from You.  I thank you that I have kept my heart tender enough to receive those little taps on the shoulder when you give them to me.  Thank you for your convictions, because they are warnings of impending danger.  Thank you for giving me armor to fight that battles that come against me.  I stand in faith for Your healing and deliverance. You are such a loving Father.

Do You Really Know Him?

For many years, I never understood the difference between knowing about Jesus and actually knowing Him.  If someone would have asked me if I was a Christian years ago, I would have certainly told them, "Yes".  I grew up going to church.  What I didn't realize for so long, is there is a difference between knowing someone and knowing about them.  For instance, I know who President Obama is, but I do not personally know him. 

Matthew 7:21 "Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in Heaven."

When I lived in the Philadelphia area, I attended a bible college for a year.  I distinctly remember a dream that I had when I was going to school there, and I don't think I'll ever forget it.  I dreamt that I had a final exam for one of my classes, and the room was very quiet.  All of a sudden, a man walked into the room and broke my concentration.  I noticed that many of the people in my class were really excited and immediately got up to speak to this man, even though they had not finished their exams.  In my dream, I was thinking, "Why is this guy here?  He's totally distracting me, and I need to finish my test!"  I sat there trying to finish, as more and more people got up from their seats to speak to this man.  I couldn't figure out who could be so important for everyone to stop taking their finals.  After sitting there getting more and more angry, I finally decided to go over and see what was so interesting.  Then I realized who He was...

That man was Jesus!

John 17:3 "And this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou has sent."

Here I was, in my dream, taking a test on "spiritual" things, and I didn't even recognize Jesus when He walked in the room!  I knew a lot about Him, but I didn't even recognize Him when I saw Him.  I believe that God used that dream to wake me up into realizing that I was doing a lot of good things for Him, but I wasn't spending any time with Him, which is what He really wants.

At that time of my life, I was so busy doing "good" things.  I was involved in my church, went to bible school, involved in church groups, etc.  That did NOT make me a Christian, though!  What makes someone a Christian is trusting Jesus as his/her Lord and Savior and having a relationship with Him.  It was after this dream that I realized that I was doing a lot of things that seemed "good", but I was not spending any quality time in prayer.  I was not spending any time getting to know Jesus better.  This reminds me of my son, Joshua.  He likes when I do things for him, but what he really wants is for me to spend quality time with him.  I continually have to "check" myself in this area, because it's so easy to be busy doing things that seem "good" and forget to spend personal time in prayer with Him, also.

I'm sure almost everyone who reads this knows who Jesus is. Even someone who's never been to church could probably name where He was born, what His mother's name was, among many other facts.  Maybe you haven't been to church since you were a child.  Maybe you've never been to church.  Perhaps you have a Master's Degree in Divinity.  You could be a bible scholar, though, and not even really know Jesus. 

You've probably done a lot of "good" things in your life. That's what makes God happy with us, right?  Sure, God likes it when we do "good" things, but that doesn't get us into Heaven.  Trusting Him as our Lord and Savior and turning away from our sins are the only things that will make you right with Him. 

For years I thought Christianity was stuffy and boring.  I thought it was all about being fake and trying to follow impossible rules.  Real Christianity is anything but that.  If you've never read my testimony, you can read it here: My First Love 
 
Do you have a personal relationship with Him?

If you don't, you need to. He loves you, no matter what you've done in your life.  He wants to have a relationship with you!

Your eternity depends on it!

Maybe you DO have a relationship with Jesus.  I challenge you to examine your life to make sure that you are not mistakenly confusing your "good works" with spending time with Him.  I continually have to remember that they are two very different things.

Romans 10:9-10, 13 "That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved."